Monday, March 24, 2008

sugar, spice...

"sugar & spice & everything nice
that`s what little girls are made of.
snips & snails & puppy dog tails,
that`s what little boys are made of."
[an old folk rhyme]

it`s actually not too far from the truth. but as it is, boys nowadays are not only looking for 'sugar & spice & everything nice'. the girls they want have a lot more substance. i went around today polling the peoples to help you, ever so dear reader, be in the know.

following on the success of the relationship-rut advice, i`ve decided not to only pay attention to those in relationships. after all, when the cat`s away, the mice will play --- but who to play with???

that`s where this comes in...
without fail, jae`s tidbit-o`-relationship-advice :)

i went around asking some guys i knew what they would look for in a girl. the results? 1) regular things that regular guys look for or 2)unique & definitely interesting. read on to see these two categories unfold in the answers...

[THE FOLLOWING VIEWS EXPRESSED ARE NOT NECESSARILY THOSE OF THE WRITER]

what do you look for in a girl?
i look for regular intelligence (not too smart, not too dumb). she has to dress nice, not slutty. mini skirts are great, but not with thongs and not too mini, or then that`s just kind of slutty. juicy TNA. not skinny, not fat, just fit. slim stomach and big chest is okay. i want an asian girl, because they`re cute & remind me of anime or china dolls. flat-chested isn`t too bad...
what about personality-wise???
she should be funny, nice...not so "OMG" all the time. a joker, but not a joker all the time. she should know when to be serious. she should be Christian. i want a girl who thinks you`re funny & will laugh when you need it. oh & she can`t think an erection is weird, especially when you`re dancing & she`s grinding up on you. after all, it`s normal. & she`s the one grinding anyway!
["ar" & "nc"]

what do you look for in a girlfriend? or a girl?
smart. pretty. has to love the Lord.
what about what she wears? does it matter?
as long as she`s dressed nicely...like if we have to go somewhere formal or something...
["ga"]

what do you look for in a girl?
smart, intelligent. good-looking. things in common with me. personality should be nice.
would you be okay if she dressed slutty? or different?
no way! not showing so much skin! it`d be such a turn off. like if she dressed like a slut...or like if she was a goth or something - i don`t really know...it`d be pretty weird...i`d like it more if she`s really hot, but maybe not.
["dy", "cm" & "jv"]

what do you look for in a girlfriend?
personality.
be specific.
a nice girl, someone i can trust...someone who likes me.
does she have to dress nice?
mm-mm. well...she`ll learn in time, right?
["jd"]

what do you look for in a girl?
hard question.
okay just...try to answer. five qualities...please?
okay...they have to look good. be smart. uh...personality-wise??? kind of a girl in some ways.
would she have to be fashionable? or could she just walk around in her trackpants & grubby old sweater?
it would depend on her personality i guess.
["jk"]

& of course, i could never leave out the girls...so for the boy-readers of SOS, here you are!
i asked the girls kind of the same questions; here are their answers...

what do you look for in a boy?
uhm...nice eyes, nice clothing...good looks...
what about personality-wise?
funny, one who listens...is thoughtful, nice, & kind of stupid.
should he dress nice?
as long as he looks clean, not like he didn`t shower for two days. those people are disgusting!
[rm]

what do you look for in a boy?
personality. he should be funny. romantic....&...funny.
what do you mean by romantic? what should he do?
he should be romantic...you know...do what romantics do.
should he dress nicely?
he should look clean, tidy...not messy.
[mrm]

what would you look for in a boy?
funny, smart, understanding, caring. God-fearing [meaning Christian], committed, decent looking...down-to-earth kind of person. not so full of himself.
what about the way he dresses?
well he`s gotta have SOME fashion sense! not so old-fashioned...but not so over-dressed. OH! no pants that go all the way down to the knees so you can see thier boxers!
[km]

what do you look for in a boy???
humorous, cute, smart, nice hair.
what about the way he dresses?
uhm...wears clean clothes? none of that...gangster low pants, funny walk garbage or super huge mandress shirts.
[ay]

what do you look for in a boyfriend?
funny, witty, able to take my sarcasm, a bit mysterious (can`t have him solved), smart, gentleman, hygienic, willing to try new things (cant be a rigid little bastard)
how about the way he dresses?
um...fitted. not like skin-tight, but just right. contouring, but not like skimpy. something that shows his assets...like nerds with their fitted dress shirts. and "just-right" khakis. color-coordination is great. but a playful medley of textures and combinations of checkers and patterns would be good too.
[stephanie, SOS]

LASTLY...i found an old meme-survey i did before i started dating mark...this is what i listed as the things i look for, most of which i`m happy to say that mark definitely exhibited.
jae`s list-of-things-she-wanted-in-a-boyfriend (before-she-found-the-love-of-her-life)
*things i would want in a boyfriend: Christian; smart [but not too smart. i need some of the smarts in the relationship!]; outrageously funny [but only when it`s really funny]; able to make me feel safe & warm; should be able to trust me with his secrets & be trustworthy with mine; hard-working; proud of what he`s accomplished; good with kids; able to wash dishes!; can dance &/or sing; can put up with mood-swings; can detect sarcasm/witticisms from a mile away, but still appreciate it; able to put up with shopping sprees; doesn`t mind me reading to him; doesn`t interrupt serious gaming; is a gamer; athletic [[& all this was just the short-list!]]

some of these things seem hard to achieve. some of them are crazy. a lot of people i asked were specific about their beliefs & faith being a top priority [myself included], while others were very specific about humour & smarts. people out there are know exactly what they are looking for.
but to be honest? my best advice for finding a boyfriend or girlfriend is to look at your expectations, look at the people around you, & not expect them to fit into your mold. let them spill over or not fill it up.
who knows, you might end up falling for somebody who is not as handsome or intelligent as you wanted. & those kinds of surprises are the best kind.

love love,
-jae, SOS

ps. sorry that there are no photos. i`ll work on that.

4 comments:

..... said...

very interestin survey !! maybe i should start doin this but for girls about guy's styles
thanks

a side order of style said...

mr. style - it`s an awesome idea, really. it gives a lot of insight into things. :) i`m glad you liked it !
-jae

Anonymous said...

Thanks for your visiting my blog and leaving a comment.
Your blog looks great.

Good luck

Bye!

a side order of style said...

fillipe - thanks for checking out our blog too!

-jae, SOS

 
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